One of the great things about photography, as opposed to moving images, is it’s ability to freeze time.  A photographs timescale is usually a fraction of a second, capturing a specific instant in time and immortalising it forever. The aim of the photographer is to imbue each image with a sense of purpose, of the place, the time, the emotion, the beauty, and to isolate the essence of the image so that it captures your imagination and tells a story in itself, and is a timeless record of that single moment in time that you wish to remember.

 

…..and then you get the duff ones.

 

Whether it be through unlucky timing, a trick of the light, a background oversight or fully intentional – that one single moment that you have recorded forever might inadvertently be a picture of the bride scratching her bum or auntie Jane picking her nose in the background.

Through the course of a wedding you usually get a few of these and normally they’re discreetly deleted without ever causing embarrassment. However, I occasionally get ones that really make me chuckle for one reason or another. And if they make me chuckle, I reckon they might make you chuckle as well. These probably aren’t the kind of photos that the bride & groom are going to proudly display on their living room wall, but I think it’d be a shame if some of them never saw the light of day.

And please don’t be offended if you see yourself in one of these photos – before posting them I always ask myself if I’d want a picture of myself looking like that plastered all over the internet – if the answer is no, it stays off the website.  And remember: were not laughing at you anyway, we’re laughing with you….or something like that… ;-)  

Okay mate, I was only asking you to smile! Belligerent toastmasters - the scourge of the wedding industry.

Okay mate, I was only asking you to smile! Belligerent toastmasters - the scourge of the wedding industry.

This is why children should always be allowed at weddings. Be sure to bring one for each drink.

This is why children should always be allowed at weddings. Be sure to bring one for each drink.

Fiona was very thorough in her preparation for the wedding. She even brought 2 sets of eyebrows just in case.

Fiona was very thorough in her preparation for the wedding. She even brought 2 sets of eyebrows just in case.

Havva & Nick started clowning around with their bridal party during the group shots, and we decided to to a synchronised group jumping shot, which I thought was a great idea…………….I’m not sure the dog was of the same opinion!

Havva & Nick started clowning around with their bridal party during the group shots, and we decided to to a synchronised group jumping shot, which I thought was a great idea…………….I’m not sure the dog was of the same opinion!

This is the Star Wars equivalent of putting a potato in a car exhaust. Take THAT Empire!

This is the Star Wars equivalent of putting a potato in a car exhaust. Take THAT Empire!

This is where the zombie apocalypse all started. With a spot of face-chewing. Mmmmmmm, face!

This is where the zombie apocalypse all started. With a spot of face-chewing. Mmmmmmm, face!

And give the bride a wee kiss……..er, wait a minute……

And give the bride a wee kiss……..er, wait a minute……

Let’s face it – we would have all tried to do the same when we were children.

Let’s face it – we would have all tried to do the same when we were children.

Spent 30 seconds carefully creeping down the aisle to see what this guy was filming and get one of those 'pic within a pic' shots. Turns out he was subtly trying to film the bride's arrival and I just got a shot of my bald dome.

Spent 30 seconds carefully creeping down the aisle to see what this guy was filming and get one of those 'pic within a pic' shots. Turns out he was subtly trying to film the bride's arrival and I just got a shot of my bald dome.

The threat of physical violence is never funny. Except when it’s on a comedy blog page.

The threat of physical violence is never funny. Except when it’s on a comedy blog page.

“The left side of my face is angered by what you’re saying!”

“The left side of my face is angered by what you’re saying!”

RUUN!!!  HE’S GOT THE LURGY!!

RUUN!!!  HE’S GOT THE LURGY!!

This is an appropriate sequence to show the amazing weather we had in the summer of 2012. I say summer – the only way you could really tell was because the wet stuff falling on you was slightly warmer.

This is an appropriate sequence to show the amazing weather we had in the summer of 2012. I say summer – the only way you could really tell was because the wet stuff falling on you was slightly warmer.

It’s all fun & games until someone chokes on a veil.

It’s all fun & games until someone chokes on a veil.

Two hands are for wimps!

Two hands are for wimps!

When kids get out of control, in my experience this is absolutely the best way to keep them in line.

When kids get out of control, in my experience this is absolutely the best way to keep them in line.

Wedding dress code: casual.

Wedding dress code: casual.

Pheeeeeeep!

Pheeeeeeep!

I’m not sure what this conversation was about, but I think the clue may be in the hand gesture…….

I’m not sure what this conversation was about, but I think the clue may be in the hand gesture…….

The confetti throwing shots are always prone to a bit of projectile mishappery – often the best you can hope for is that nobody gets blinded! In this particular case Vicky the bride has apparently had a very fetching blue and green moustache grafted onto her face. Looks itchy!

The confetti throwing shots are always prone to a bit of projectile mishappery – often the best you can hope for is that nobody gets blinded!

In this particular case Vicky the bride has apparently had a very fetching blue and green moustache grafted onto her face. Looks itchy!

Looks like Rob has had an idea…..it’s just that his light bulb has gone off in the wrong place

Looks like Rob has had an idea…..it’s just that his light bulb has gone off in the wrong place

I’ve been caught with THIS one before…….here’s a tip: If you ever see some kind of seizure on the dancefloor, give it a second or two before you attempt CPR. Turns out they’re usually dancing.

I’ve been caught with THIS one before…….here’s a tip:

If you ever see some kind of seizure on the dancefloor, give it a second or two before you attempt CPR.

Turns out they’re usually dancing.

You may struggle to see the comedy value of the above pic. The action was actually happening behind the lens this time. Having assembled the entire wedding party on the steps at Duntreath Castle (Amazing venue!) for the big group shot, I crouched down to see what the angle looked like…..and was greeted by a loud ripping sound coming from behind me. Yes, there’s no better time to split your trousers right up the back than when you’re trying to look like the consummate professional in front of a hundred people. To add insult to injury I’d chosen brightly coloured pants that day. At least I didn’t have to try very hard to get them laughing for the photo…….

You may struggle to see the comedy value of the above pic. The action was actually happening behind the lens this time. Having assembled the entire wedding party on the steps at Duntreath Castle (Amazing venue!) for the big group shot, I crouched down to see what the angle looked like…..and was greeted by a loud ripping sound coming from behind me. Yes, there’s no better time to split your trousers right up the back than when you’re trying to look like the consummate professional in front of a hundred people. To add insult to injury I’d chosen brightly coloured pants that day.

At least I didn’t have to try very hard to get them laughing for the photo…….